as the titled said it:i am DAMN pissed off!!!! hello! in case you havent noticed, my sight reading is not so good to the extent that i can read pedal and notes at the same time given that i have practised that piece with the old pedalling for like 2 months!!! its not that easy to change. and you are seriously misunderstanding me. im not worried about competition. im just FRUSTRATED. do you not KNOW what FRUSTRATED means???? and you keep repeating the exercise you asked me to do. not like i have an IQ of charlie gordon ( no offence) i know what to do just that my fingers arent listening.

so stressed lately dunno why, i just fee like crying. its just not helping that my mum can make me feel like i have an IQ worse than charlie gordon and possibly the worst person to ever have walked on EARTH. my ego can only take that much okay. now i feel really really lonely and emo. its like im suddenly tired of living, of being me tied to all this homework, tradition, being proper and all. i just want to do something else, at least do what i want for once. not some idiot of a paper. its like the real me is just lost in all this academic rush....i dont even know who i really am anymore

--seriously depressed me